When I was growing up, the thing I liked best about school was going home to a grilled cheese sandwich......a Velveeta grilled cheese sandwich to be exact. As far as I know, my mother didn't spend a lot of time researching the origins of Velveeta cheese, so I hope she wasn't doing anything un-American.

Fearing for her patriotism, I decided to research it for her and this is what I found: Velveeta n. The trade name Velveeta is attached in the U.S. to a particularly nasty processed-cheese spread. (WordNet, Princeton University).

Needless to say, my mother's patriotism remains in tact, but now I wonder why my mother would give me a particularly nasty processed-cheese spread as an afternoon snack. The reason is most likely because 'foreign cheese' wasn't advertised on TV until 1965 when Boursin was first introduced and much later in 1975, the first "guaranteed origin" label was attributed to Roquefort cheese, 23 years after the 1953 Stresa Convention, ratified by France, Italy, Switzerland, Austria, Scandinavia and Holland that screened certain national sorts of cheeses (Parmesan, Roquefort, Gorgonzola) from counterfeiting.

WOW!

Fearing for my own patriotism, I was relieved to learn halfway through the PBS special that in July of 2003, Ms. Child received the Presidential Medal of Freedom at a ceremony held at the White House, the Nation's highest civil honor. Upon her death last week at age 91, the President issued this statement: "Julia Child enriched America with her optimism and enthusiasm for life. She worked with the Office of Strategic Services to protect freedom during World War II. She taught millions to enjoy cooking, and her legacy will continue through her books and videos. She was a pioneer in the early television age who made great strides for women."

WHEW!

Don't know about you, but I'm keeping my "Mastering the Art of French Cooking" even if this campaign turns into a food fight. I would suggest, however, that John Kerry would be wise to just say no to anything that smells worse than Velveeta.

A long time fixture on the Washington social scene since her 1984 marriage to lawyer Robert Altman, protégé of legendary presidential adviser Clark Clifford, Lynda Carter remains not only as stunning but as nice and down to earth as ever. Now the mother of two teenagers, she's thriving both personally and professionally. Although her 70's Wonder Years are behind her, she has no complaints while balancing family, career and charity work as well as being a political activist.

Like some of her counterparts in Batwoman/Batgirl and Catwoman with leading ladies Halle Berry, Michelle Pfeiffer, Sharon Stone and Ertha Kitt purring and clawing their way through the likes of Jack Nicholson on the silver screen, she has sharpened her political skills.

Here are some other takes from the Cat/Bat crypts: When Ertha Kitt took her Vietnam dissent to a White House party in 1968 as a guest of Lady Bird Johnson, she was stunned at the outcome, "I thought I was invited to the White House to give my opinion about the problems in the United States at that time, and why the young people were so angry," Kitt remembers. She promptly became a target of the CIA.

Michelle Pfeiffer lets David Kelley, her mega producer hubby, do the political bidding for her via his quirky and highly successful TV shows that include Ally McBeal, Picket Fences and The Practice. Talented Halle Berry has enough of her own problems to deal with politics.

Actress Sharon Stone went politically ballistic when she accused George Bush of preventing her from kissing Halle Berry in "Catwoman". ''Halle's so beautiful, and I wanted to kiss her. I said, 'How can you have us in the movie and not have us kiss? It's such a waste.' But that's what you get for having George Bush as president.''

HUH?

In Washington, as elsewhere, it's politics are usual.

The 78 year old & 11 time Grammy winner defied all laws of aging with duel appearances in Washington; first at The Filene Center for the Performing Arts and later at P&C Art.

The popular crooner moves easily between the two genres. Bennett's music career took an upswing when he appeared with the Chili Peppers in 1993 on MTV, orchestrated by his manager son Danny. Although his relaxed and gentle manner would normally defy such an audience, it was the origins of his 'comeback' which he parlayed into a whole new generation of listeners.

As for his art career, it actually prefaced his musical one, having begun chalk drawings at the age of 5 on the streets of New York. He continues to paint everyday, even if sketching from his hotel window. Benedetto paintings have been owned by the late Cary Grant & Frank Sinatra, Carol Burnett, Whoopie Goldberg, Donald Trump, Oprah Winfrey, Mickey Rooney, and Katie Couric.

Meanwhile, over in Norway, thieves stunned visitors when they pulled an art heist and walked away with Edvard Munch's famous painting 'The Scream' and "Madonna" making Washington seem like just another sleepy day in August.

Well, gotta go now and rev up for six sleepless nights at the RNC convention. So, that's all folks.

Yup, that's all!